Building Self-Esteem: A Blog with Sarah Burney, LCSW, CEDS-S, CNS

Hi Sarah Burney! Can you tell readers a bit about yourself?

I specialize in treating all types of eating disorders, acute & complex trauma, substance abuse, obsessive compulsive disorder, and depressive/anxiety disorders. My experience includes providing intensive therapy at inpatient & outpatient treatment centers for eating disorders, mental health, and substance abuse for over a decade, and now I’m in private practice. I use a humanistic and psychoanalytic therapeutic approach, and I also do EMDR. Overall my goal is to create a safe environment where people feel supported and simultaneously challenged to take steps towards their goals.

I enjoy spending time with family and friends, often times outdoors, especially at the beach/in the water. I also love traveling and go to India each year, and usually one other tropical location with my friends/family.

I’ve seen the work you do and can attest to the fact that you do a great job helping people feel supported and challenged at the same time. So many people throw around the concept of self-esteem. First, can you tell us: what is self-esteem? And can self-esteem actually be improved?

What is self-esteem:

  • Self-esteem refers to our evaluation of our overall value.

  • “To have self-esteem”means we view ourselves as having value. Conversely,“to not have self-esteem”means we view ourselves as not having value.

How do we determine our value: 

  • Our overall value is compilation of our confidence multiple domains (or areas), such as: school, career, physical appearance, finances, personality traits, social skills, emotional regulation, etc.

  • Domains can be broken down into two categories: "external domains” and “internal domains”. 

  • Internal domains are foundational, and are necessary, for us to have good self-esteem. 

  • Domains for internal self-esteem can include building confidence in our: personality traits, emotions, temperament, needs, desires, and integrity (acting in line with our values). 

  • Internal self-esteem is determined by our confidence in our perception of who we innately are. 

  • External domains are valuable, but are not required to have good self-esteem. 

  • External self-esteem is self-esteem we have because of our confidence in various external domains (or areas), which is built as a result of perceived success in said domains.

  • Domains for building external self-esteem can include our: physical appearance, finances, education, career, relationships, and success as it relates to meeting society’s material standards. 

  • For example, internal domains are the inside of the book, and external domains are the cover of the book.

Yes! I’m a book person, so I love that analogy. What are some good activities to build self-esteem?

Act in line with your values —— first you have to determine what your values even are! And then place them in a hierarchy. From there, you have to commit to acting in line with them!

What are your impressions of the impact of social media on self-esteem? 

 Not great for self esteem because it encourages comparison, and not only that, comparisons to images that are unrealistic/fake, and thus comparison to unrealistic standards. 

 Absolutely. Thanks so much, Sarah. Where can people find you?

 Visit burneytherapygroup.com or call/text 949-307-2112 or email info@burneytherapygroup.com.

 

Previous
Previous

Sex and Embodiment: A Blog with Amy Furuyama, MSW, LCSW

Next
Next

College and the Freshman 15